23 October 2010

careful what you wish for...

Last night was basically a Shit Show.

Last night I was itching to go out and do something other than sit at home and knit for yet another Friday night.
Well this is a blog about being careful what you wish for.

At first I was going to blog about all the shit that went down for therapeutic reasons but I've changed my mind about that too. I do not know who reads my blog and when and I won't condemn anyone here.

What I will say is that it got so bad that I had to walk away. My "lifeguard" training over powered my "Mother Bear" attitude...
If you know me at all, you know I care about people a lot!! I can meet you at a party and in the same night be holding your hair back as you puke or staying over to make sure no one takes advantage. So when I say last night got so bad that I walked away from someone I have known for 9 years, I want you to understand the gravity of how I feel.

No I did not walk away because I was angry. I walked away because the lifeguard in me said "you only go in for the rescue if you know you can save at least yourself." And last night this person was beyond saving.
Yes I did go in the for the rescue but it got to the point where if I hadn't walked away, I might have drowned too.

I'm praying for those who were lost last night. I sincerely hope that they find their way home, both literally and figuratively.

I'm thankful that I had the Powers That Be watching over me, that I got home safe, and that I have enough Street Cred to take care of my self.

I'm sorry for ever underestimating just staying home.

And if those who were there last night ever read this, I forgive you.
But no, I can't ever forget.

That being said, I am thankful for that I have and next time I'll be more careful for what I wish for...

I also hope that my next blog post can go back to being about stupid pop culture things, fun friends and hot boys...<3

Until next time, take care.

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